The fact that Dustin Lance Black will — at least for the time being — be better known for his sexual activities than for his Milk screenplay says more about our society (or societies, since the thing has gone global) than about Black himself, whose sex life — with or without condoms; with or without a camera — should be his business and nobody else's.
Some have tried to turn the online leak of Black's sex photos into something of momentous importance for gay rights, the spread of HIV, etc. In truth, except for Black and his sex partner those photos are irrelevant. Really, will anyone now decide to fight against marriage equality simply because of Black's sexual life? Will gay youth the world over go on a condomless sex rampage because of those photos?
Since I'm unfamiliar with Black's "gay activism," I don't know if he has attempted to pass himself off as a "role model" to anyone, or if it's been others with little imagination and few brain cells who have labeled him thus. In fact, those who push the idea of "perfect" role models aren't just stupid, they're dishonest as well. After all, role-model proponents are adults. They know better.
I remember that as a kid I never wanted to be like someone else. What I wanted was to grow up and be my own individual self. I didn't want to be like the other boys, like the grown men I knew, like girls, like grown women, like hermaphrodites. I wanted to be me. And what I resented the most was having adults — always with the best intentions, of course — disrespecting my intelligence and my personal integrity by trying to coerce me into following someone else's steps; what they thought would be appropriate for me.
To me, their stance felt particularly offensive because I'd inevitably find out that the role models in question didn't live up to their public image. Adults were usually shocked — horrified — by the revelation. (Or, more likely, they merely pretended to be.) But even as a kid, I'd just think to myself, What's the big fucking deal? The guy is human, so what? I'd also have my core belief reaffirmed: To hell with role models; when I grow up I want to be myself.
Somewhat ironically, in late summer Black is scheduled to direct Liam Neeson and Jennifer Connelly in What's Wrong with Virginia, a drama that pits a man's public persona against his "shady" private life. Written by Black, the story follows a psychologically unbalanced woman (Connelly) whose 20-year secret love affair with a Mormon sheriff (Neeson) may become an issue now that he is running for a state senate seat.