Vampires Suck Movie Box Office: Twilight Spoof Lands with a Thud

Vampires Suck movie with Matt Lanter and Jenn Proske: Twilight spoof could turn out to be a profitable box office dud. Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, and Taylor Lautner star in the actual Twilight movies, the latest of which, Eclipse, broke several records upon its summer 2010 release.

Vampires Suck movie box office: Twilight spoof fails to entice Twihards & Twihaters alike – yet it could still turn out to be a moneymaker

Aug. 20–22 weekend box office: Early non-official weekend estimates had the Twilight Saga spoof Vampires Suck, which opened last Wednesday to bloody awful reviews, running neck and neck with last weekend’s champ, Sylvester Stallone’s blow-’em-up actioner The Expendables. That proved to be inaccurate.

Written and directed by Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, Vampires Suck drew in a meager $12.2 million from 3,223 venues at no. 2 – vs. The Expendables’ $17 million at no. 1 – while totaling only $18.6 million over the course of its first five days out according to final studio figures found at boxofficemojo.com.

The silver lining: Featuring Jenn Proske (the dazed human), Matt Lanter (the sulking vampire), and Chris Riggi (the studly werewolf), Vampires Suck has one advantage over The Expendables: Its low cost. After only five days, the Regency Enterprises/20th Century Fox satire has nearly matched its reported $20 million budget (as always, not including marketing and distribution expenses).

Also in the Vampires Suck cast: Diedrich Bader, Ken Jeong, Anneliese van der Poland, and The Kids in the Hall veteran David Foley.

Eight-figure-yet-profitable worldwide gross?

Update: Vampires Suck ultimately collected a modest $36.7 million domestically and a slightly less modest $43.9 million (likely incomplete) internationally, for a worldwide total of $80.5 million.

These are hardly Twilight Saga-caliber figures, but they’re not bad at all for a $20 million production.

Vampires Suck’s top international territories were Germany ($8.1 million), Italy ($6 million), the United Kingdom/Ireland ($4.8 million), Spain ($4.7 million), Mexico ($2.7 million), Russia/CIS ($2.4 million), and Brazil ($2.3 million). (Note: France’s total, $1.5 million, seems to be incomplete.)

Disappointing new entries starring Jennifer Aniston, Jason Bateman & Emma Thompson

For the record, rounding out the Top Eight – including four new releases – on this past weekend’s box office chart were the following:

• At no. 3, Ryan Murphy’s romantic drama Eat Pray Love grossed $12.1 million (down 48 percent on its second weekend). Cume: $47.2 million. Cast: Julia Roberts and Javier Bardem.
• At no. 4, Erik White’s comedy Lottery Ticket debuted with an underwhelming $10.7 million from 1,973 sites. Cast: Bow Wow and Brandon T. Jackson. Distributor: Warner Bros. Budget: $17 million.
• At no. 5, Adam McKay’s action comedy The Other Guys grossed $10.2 million (down 42 percent on its third weekend). Cume: $88.3 million. Cast: Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg.
• At no. 6, Alexandre Aja’s horror comedy Piranha 3D debuted with an also underwhelming $10.1 million from 2,470 sites. Cast: Elisabeth Shue, Steven R. McQueen, and Adam Scott. Distributor: Dimension Films. Budget: $24 million.
• At no. 7, Will Speck and Josh Gordon’s romantic comedy The Switch debuted with a downright disappointing $8.44 million from 2,012 sites. Cast: Jennifer Aniston, Jason Bateman, and Patrick Wilson. Distributor: Miramax Films. Budget: $19 million.
• At no. 8, Susanna White’s fantasy comedy Nanny McPhee Returns (original title: Nanny McPhee and the Big Bang) debuted with an even more disappointing $8.4 million from 2,784 sites. Cast: Emma Thompson and Asa Butterfield. Distributor: Universal Pictures. Budget: $35 million.

Update: Nanny McPhee and the Big Bang ultimately performed remarkably well in the United Kingdom/Ireland. Cume: $23.6 million. Worldwide total: $93.3 million.

Relatively speaking, that was a healthy global cume. It just wasn’t healthy enough for the comedy fantasy to break even.

“Vampires Suck Movie Box Office” endnotes

Unless otherwise noted, “Vampires Suck Movie Box Office: Twilight Spoof Lands with a Thud” box office information via Box Office Mojo. Budget info – which should be taken with a grain of salt – via BOM and/or other sources (e.g., the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, Screen Daily, The Hollywood Reporter, Variety, Deadline.com, etc.).

Comments about Vampires Suck, Lottery Ticket, Piranha 3D, The Switch, Nanny McPhee Returns, and other titles being hits/profitable or flops/money-losers at the box office (see paragraph below) are based on the available data about their production budget, additional marketing and distribution expenses (as a general rule of thumb, around 50 percent of the production cost), and worldwide gross (as a general rule of thumb when it comes to the Hollywood studios, around 50–55 percent of the domestic gross and 40 percent of the international gross goes to the distributing/producing companies).

Bear in mind that data regarding rebates, domestic/international sales/pre-sales, and other credits and/or contractual details that help to alleviate/split production costs and apportion revenues are oftentimes unavailable, and that reported international grosses may be incomplete (i.e., not every territory is fully – or even partially – accounted for).

Also bear in mind that ancillary revenues (domestic/global television rights, home video sales, streaming, merchandising, etc.) can represent anywhere between 40–70 percent of a movie’s total take. However, these revenues and their apportionment are only infrequently made public.

Jenn Proske and Matt Lanter Vampires Suck movie image: 20th Century Fox.

“Vampires Suck Movie Box Office: Twilight Spoof Lands with a Thud” last updated in February 2023.